So I recently turned 19 a few weeks ago, and it's only really dawned on me on how much older I'm getting. Not only physically, but mentally as well. I've been feeling it for quite a while now, but now's the only time that I'm being open about this and exposing myself.
The other night we had a dinner party at my place to celebrate the graduation of my sisters. I stayed at the one of tables with my titos and titas and a few cousins, most of which were college/doctors. Our main conversation consisted of operations, diseases, dissection, and other medical jargon.
This situation isn't foreign to me. Now that I'm in college, some of the frequent topics of discussion is the lessons in biology class and lab, our future, diseases, medicine etc. The time has past when we'd plan what we'd be doing this weekend. Instead, we're planning on what we're doing 10+ years from now, once we finish med school, residency, the board exams etc. The time has past when we'd only talk about video games, girls, and food. Now, we're thinking about what medical schools we'd go to, when we're going to get married, and how many kids we want to have.
I honestly don't know if this has anything to do with my course, my school, or my choice of friends. Though I think I can rule out friends. I don't see any of my high school friends sharing in my predicament. I think I can also rule out school since I have some other friends in my school who aren't as burdened with the future as I am. I think it's because of my course, of the standards it sets, with the expectations people have of the students come from my course. The pressure that society puts on us practically forces us to grow up faster than we would like. I remember that when I was in high school, I would spend my nights playing tetris battle on facebook, having a movie/series marathon, or playing with my PS3 until the wee hours of the morning. But now that I'm in college, I NEED to study every night. Before in high school, when I did study, it would for about less than hour, an hour at max. But now, I need to study for multiple hours, until I memorize and understand the topics for our test.
I think that this entire thing comes with age. It's like with what they said in spider-man: "with great power, comes great responsibility." The older one gets, the more freedom he/she has to do whatever the fuck they want. But along with that, they have more responsibilities that they must fulfill, in exchange for their "freedom".
Anyways, I think that now that it's summer, I need to enjoy it as best I can because I'm at the point in my life where I am given the freedom to do as I wish, since I am legal. And since it is summer, it's the best time to go out and enjoy myself because I don't think I'd be able to once the school year begins anew.
Peace out!
Keep Dreaming.
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